My First Style Influence .... A Style Tribute to My Mother

~~~ Today is my Mother's heavenly birthday 

so I am republishing one of my 

very first blog posts

from 11 years ago 

with some new notes at the end ~~~

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 My mother ......was definitely the one who most influenced me in my love of all things stylish.

Throughout her life, no matter the year, she always was stylish ....

And oh so 'put together'

It is from my mother I developed the love of all things ' accessories'

It is from my mother I developed my love of clothes...

The love of all the 'pieces' that make up an 'outfit'.

The love of all things accessorized.

My love of dressing for occasions.

From my mother I learned to dress not only myself...... 

 but also...... to dress my family.

From my mother I learned to show my family love, by dressing them well.

Happy Birthday
Mother!

Thank you so much for all the style and love you have given me!

I love you!

My favorite part of this post ....

I did it 11 years ago.

It was one of my very first.

She was alive to read it.

So make that call.

Make sure your people

know you love them.

I still miss my Mother

probably more than I thought I would

four years later.

Happy Heavenly Birthday Mother!

I love you

and 

even more

appreciate all you did!

As always my friends

I wish you love and joy

as you style your life

What I Wore … Apple Picking … and A Little Family Reflection

Fall has arrived here in Southern California
(at least on the calendar)

and

I am ever so grateful 

to once again do  our family tradition of

Apple Picking in Glen Oak!

I have written many times by now 

of our
family Labor Day tradition

HERE, HERE and HERE.
They have always been reflective posts
on the seasons of our family at the time.

This year I am beginning my post with what I chose to Wear.

Apple Picking with my family is  something I look forward to every year

and 

I know I enjoy it even more  

with an outfit I am excited to wear!

So I spent the week before

looking for some new  perfect fall pieces to wear

apple picking!

I  also knew I didn't want to spend more than $100 

to fluff up my  fall  apple picking outfit

so I must say I was absolutely tickled 

when I found three new pieces at Target

that made for some perfect fall  wardrobe fluffing!

I found a fabulous maxi fringed voile kimono

a faux furry vest 

and

a voile  sleeveless dress

all three for under $100!

I layered my new pieces 

with my dark wash skinny jeans

and
a new fall ensemble 

had begun!

My felted floppy hat matched the Boho vibe 

this outfit was channeling!

Which made for the perfect occasion 

to pull out my bold and chunky

charm bracelet!

One tip I always have for apple picking

some type of closed toe shoe
it's dusty in an orchard.

Preferably some type of boot variation.

I finished off my outfit

with a sued ankle boot.

Our apple picking weather ended up to be quite warm

so the voile dress and jeans

was perfect for picking

and 

for lunch afterward I just added the fringed kimono back on!

I can tell how much our family dynamics have settled

and 

what a good place we are all in

by the sheer fact that this  post started with a wardrobe  component.

With my children's teen years behind them

(with my youngest heading towards his 20th birthday next year)

they are all 

in the process of building lives of their own

all three with loves of their own.

Wedding preparations 

are going full force here 

for  next May's nuptials!

Ellis and Elliot

both are deep into their careers

and 

living their dream in downtown San Diego

in a fabulous new urban location

where they can walk to work

and 

appreciate all the vibrant energy the city has to offer!

College and work are in full force for Hunter

and

I couldn't be prouder of the relationship he and Megan have.

I am always so happy and grateful

when these  four join  Jeff and I 

for our annual 

Apple picking!

This year my heart is happy

as I embrace the coming chapters 

and
new seasons

in our family history.

Now I can finally see

an empty nest

is a transition into the next good to come.

My heart is full 

as I look forward to my children

celebrating 

the loves of their lives

and 

eventually starting families of their own.

The last few years 

have felt like seasons of change

that can come in  the midst of stormy weather

but

I  am finally to a vantage point

where I can see and welcome 

all the new seasons in  our family.

As always my friends

I wish you love and joy

as you style your life

… an estrangement ...

I hesitate to write about this 

and

 I hesitate not to write. 

If we do not speak of the hurt

it does not mean it goes away

rather at times 

it can fester

into anger and hate

and

 often times the rage is aimed at our own heart.

So I write.

even though my heart is now on the mend.

I write so I remember.

I want to remember my own questions ... 

because having a child estrange himself from 

your family

brings complicated emotions

and sometimes they come in as questions …

Is it my fault?

Could I have done something different?

If I was the parent then …

that I am now …

would it be different.

How long will this phase last?

Will I even see him again?
Would this have happened , no matter what I did?

But mostly I wonder

in his heart of hearts 

Does he know just how much I love him.

There is much grieving

by many in a chosen estrangement

Next to my sister's death

this … and the years leading up to it

have been the hardest for me.

But it s a quiet suffering

the kind that is usually behind doors

but to me

keeping it secret gives it a shame 

I am not willing to wear.

A chosen estrangement

is brutal

and there is no public rite of passage

No sorrowful good bye

IT is a limbo

filled with hope and fear

and wondering 

when and if it will end.

The wondering if he is OK

the tensing up

every time our land line rings

and

 what dreaded news could be on the other end.

As far as I know

he is still in school and working

and

in  committed relationship

and

 even has a new puppy 

but also a motorcycle

and

 he has an intensity I can relate to

and

 that is why I have always worried about him 

Intensity has many beautiful attributes 

it allows you to feel and see so much beauty in the world

but it has a double edge

that can take you to the other side.

His phone goes unanswered

my texts of love and support

perhaps unread.

We all have reached out

with no avail.

So I must realize

It is what it is.

Give myself moments to grieve

and
 then pack it back up

and

 move forward

with gratitude

for the beauty and love in my life

Knowing I can still 

make a beautiful life

even with a hole in my heart.

I send my son much love

and prayers

that his heart may be healed.

Hello Monday ... Hello Holiday Gratitude ...

Today I am grateful for 

clothes that comfort

and 

embrace

like a good safe hug.

Clothes that can give you that extra boost

when you need it most

Clothes that can make getting out of bed

and

 out into the world

a reality

even when your heart breaks.

I mentioned last week 

I have had an emotional time of late.

I have thought long and hard

whether I would mention why...

but this is a space that is mine

and 

where I am honest 

about things of the heart.

My oldest son has decided at this time in his life

he doesn't want to be a part of our family.

Having a child choosing to estrange themselves 

form your family

brings a plethora

of complicated emotions

even if the writing has been on the wall.

Having this happen at the holidays

further complicates the emotions

Don't get me wrong

as much as my heart is broken

I know there are much worse holiday scenarios.

It was the holiday season many, many years ago

that my sister died.

I hope in my heart of hearts

my son won't always feel this way.

Ironically I made the same choice at his age.

Only to later realize the importance 

and privilege of family.

Right now

it is what it is.
I must respect his decision.

I send him  much love and prayers

and 

I will always be here for him.

I also know

sometimes 

when your heart breaks open

you can  also see the true beauty

in your life

with more clarity of heart.

So this week even with a very tender heart

it is full of gratitude

especially for my Dad's health

for a lovely time spent with family  this Thanksgiving.

My heart is grateful for my daughter

and 

younger son

and 

the privilege of spending time with them.

I am so grateful that my husband and I are

close once again ... on the same side.

I am so  very grateful for our family.

My heart is full of family love

and 

so grateful for spending time with my girl

and 

counting the days until

she returns once again for the holidays.

I am grateful we found our tree

and

 that my favorite season 

is officially under way.

I am grateful for Christmas carols and the depth of emotion they can add 

at a moments notice.

I am grateful to find creative inspiration

in so many places!

I was inspired with this lovely bunting

in Old Town Orange

and 

can't wait to make some myself!

I am happy I have my holiday plantings done

and 

outside rooms decorated

I can't wait to share them!

I am grateful for quiet times and morning candlelight

Time to reflect

and

 count my blessing

with a grateful heart.

I am so very grateful for you  who stop by...

I am ever so grateful for this loving

supporting community

where we can honestly share

and be

Grateful.

as always my friends

I wish you love and joy

as you style your life

and 

count your blessings

... when shopping for new shoes... is more than shopping for shoes ...

I am on the hunt today for new shoes...

And I know I'm really shopping for so much more....

I want to find a  new piece that will tie the other pieces

that are mine

 together...

I want to find something...

I can put on... and feel happier...

Slip myself into a happier self...

where all the pieces fit...

and the sadness and hurt are shed.

I want to a pair that puts some zing back in my step...

It's been a hard week for me here...

One where gratitude lists...

still didn't cut through the heartache...

Realizing...

sometimes it's OK...

to say I am hurt...

hurting...

without fearing a slip down the rabbit hole into depression.

For me there is growth in

admitting hurt...

for I have always been much more comfortable...

just staying in anger.

Realizing...

sometimes those closest to us...

can hurt us the most...

and there is nothing to do...

but move on...

and look for new happiness...

and sometimes...

a new pair of shoes...

as always my friends

I wish you love and joy
as you style your life

.... Airstream Spring Break ....

We have returned from a very successful spring break with our airstream.

On the drive up  the hills above Santa Barbara were ablaze with wildflowers.

Our destination the Central Coast...

on the dunes of Pismo....

proved as breathtaking as ever.

We have been coming here for years...

The first time was the very first week we had our airstream...

we came up on a whim...

after I saw this RV park in a travel magazine.

Little did I know at the time it was to make itself into our family history.

After traveling here several times...

we decided to look at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo...

as Ellis was nearing her college decision.

After her choice was made we came up for more campus touring

as she prepared to make her move.

It was here I came back one night devastated and heart broken

 as Ellis moved in...

and on...

But it is also here that I have returned many times since...

healed..and with a grateful heart.

It is here we return once again...

 as my youngest begins his college tours..

and some spring break fun!

Hunter was able to achieve his spring break. 

His time out for days of fun with his dad...

 left me with plenty of time on my own...

to do some of the things I love best...

like hiking off to explore new destinations...

and

 stumbling onto breath taking views...

exploring the charms of Pismo on foot...

.... and finding jewelry inspirations waiting for me on the beach.

Wardrobe packing for Pismo airstream trips is delightfully simple....especially this trip...

where it was all about Hunter having a good time on spring break!

Packing was as simple as grabbing...

white jeans...

nautical stripes... including my new favorite piece from Anthropologie...

a dress... I have incorporated into a tunic over my jeans...

a denim trench and shirt...

no makeup...

no hair styling...

just my panama and a navy beret....

my pearl and shell necklace...

2 scarves for quick and cozy color 

and 

my  trusty and comfortable leopard flats that got me all through Europe this fall.

These pieces had me covered for all that we did...

completely comfortable and functional

and

 I always felt polished enough to stop anywhere for dinners.

While Hunter was spending time on campus with his sister....

Jeff and I drove up the coast towards San Simeon...

and were absolutely amazed by the beauty we encountered at every turn....

everywhere we looked....

we found such beauty.

Pismo is one of the rare places in California...

where you can actually drive on the beach...

and trust me...it's a view that never gets old.

as always dear friends

I wish you love and joy

as you style your life

thanks so for stopping by!