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How I Lost Over 40 Pounds


Recently I have had many people
ask me to share

how I lost over 40 pounds

and
just as importantly
kept it off.


There was no easy fix.

But I did figure out how to 
make sustainable
life changes
that added up to the successful
weight loss I was after.
I think of them as my
building blocks .



The changes I made 
 came out of one of the lowest points
of my life.
Sometimes if we are able to harness our pain
it can become the impetus for the change we seek.


I only share that
because if I wasn't in a deep dark pain
I probably wouldn't have put 
in the tremendous effort I needed to really change.


I remember wondering at the end of 2020
when I started
if there would come a time
I would be 
grateful for the pain
as an impetus for change.


I am.
But it was a long and uncomfortable road.
As true life changes 
usually are.




There had been so much loss and sadness since November 7th, 2017
weight gan over the three following years 
was literally the least of my problems.
Even coming across this shocking to me picture
from May of 2020
didn't kick in any change.


I was in a continual state of what felt to me
 of surviving and coping.
And I thought chardonnay was my best friend.


I drank to forget I was more overweight than I felt acceptable.
I drank hard a couple  of those years to drown out a broken heart form a marital infidelity.
During that time my mother's health was failing.
During an eight month span 
she had a broken back,  broken hip, pneumonia, another broken hip
and 
more respiratory problems
until her little body just gave out.
I drank because of my Mom dying.
I drank because of my oldest son 
 once more decided to  estrange from the family.
I drank because on January 22 of 2020
 my husband was let go from his executive job 
of 25 years
out of the blue.
I drank because I was so scared
while my dad was in the ICU for months during  COVID
after complications from what was supposed to be a simple surgery.
I drank more when he died.
I drank because my youngest moved with his family to Texas.

But mainly  I drank 
because I felt like a life failure.



I continued to drink (a lot) until
Christmas Eve 2020
I woke up in the middle of the night
literally realizing 
there wasn't enough alcohol in the world 
to ease my pain.
I remember feeling if I didn't wake up in the morning
I would be OK with that.
Everything
just felt like too much.


And 
if I did wake up
I would have to make  some drastic changes
in my life.
This way was way too painful.



It took me a couple of days to come up with a plan.






First off was to do a painful breakup
with 
Chardonnay
Maybe it wouldn't be forever
(it wasn't0
but I knew it would have to be at least 

30 Days Alcohol Free

I wrote about my story HERE


My  friend Adrienne Shubin
had shared her no Alcohol story
and
 had mentioned the book 


I bought all the Quit Lit she recommended.

is Adrienne's blog link



The next 30 days
were awful
and 
I hard 
 so many pity parties 
feeling like I was giving up the only source of joy
I allowed myself.


I never really thought I would be successful with
 changing my relationship with wine.


But I did.
And that  was 
life changing.


I realized what a daily habit 
having wine had become.


I drank as a reward for accomplishment
at the end of the day.

I drank if I was sad.
I drank if I was happy.


I realized how stunted my
 coping strategies 
had become.
And just how habitual.


I realized how
 limiting my own 
Self Belief 
had become.


Slowly I began to make other changes
as I could step back 
and
observe bad habits
and 
self defeating coping strategies.


2020 vs 2021



Again I followed Adrienne's advice.
She had shared how 
Intermittent Fasting 
had also helped her in losing 90 pounds.


I was in.
But carefully.


Because I had suffered from an eating disorder
for too many years to count.
Bulimia had been a part of my life
a big, big part 
at one point
before I had children.

Intermittentant Fasting
works for me, surprisingly.

It lets me feel more in control of what I eat
and
 when.
The added benefit being that I sleep so much better too!


I started out slowly
and
 then began getting down to 
a six to eight hour window of eating.


I'm not recommending this to everyone
but with my past and history
it works for me.


The other part of  my success with

Intermittent Fasting
is being

Calorie Deficit

which is simply eating less calories
thank my body needs 
in order to loose weight.


That really is the bottom line of the weight loss
There are just a lot of 
supportive components 
to make this doable 
and 
more importantly
consistent.






The next building block was to up my physical activity.
I have always worked out.

Just as much for mental health
as 
physical health.

I increased my hike from 2-3 miles a day
to 5-6 miles last summer.

I average about 3 miles a day
5 days a week now.


We are very fortunate to live in an area
with spectacular hiking opportunities. 
Jeff and I have made them part of our 
healthy lifestyle.


They are a gift I am always 
Grateful 
for.


Hiking in Nature
is what I do for my
Mind, Body and Soul.

I also weight train 3 days a week
with yoga and Pilates rounding out my work outs.




I think there are so many different ways to lose weight.

But I think
 one of the most important building blocks
is replacing
self sabotaging habits 
with 
healthier, successful habits.


Simply said
 new ways 
to find joy!


One thing that has really helped me

My Gratitude List.
I write it down 
every morning
right next to my to Do List.


It really helps me focus on all of the good
in my life.


It also helps me stay positive
with my progress
which sometimes felt incredibly slow.


But trust me
a lot of little changes
carried out consistently
really do make a difference.





I believe I was able to make changes
because I was at a point
not to change 
was just too painful.




And now I know
it really isn't about 
the weight
or 
drinking or not drinking.

It's about developing
a good relationship
with my self.

It is really about learning to trust myself.

To have compassion for myself.


To realize
I might not have always gotten it right
but I know I was always
trying my best.


I just needed learn more successful 
coping strategies
when it got down to it.
i needed to get to a place
where I allowed myself to succeed.


To find new ways of coping 
that don't 
Self Sabotage
the things I am working on
and 
hold important.



Better 
healthier 
ways for me
to find joy.



And little by little
learn to see myself
more lovingly.




One thing the last four years 
have taught me is

 life is hard enough
without being at 
war with myself.





 

And when we know better
we do better.

True personal change
is a process.
And it can come out of pain.
There really is no perfect time
to decide to change your life for the better.



I started my process with one step
and 
continued to add the others
as I got solid with each building block.


~ Changing my relationship to Alcohol
~ Intermittent Fasting
~ Consistent Calorie Deficient
~ Consistent and Sustainable Work Outs

and 
most importantly to me
I added
 new to me
~ Successful Coping Strategies
to my self discipling
so that I could sustain
the process of change!


A process that needs
all the 
Self Compassion
you can find.




As always my friends

I wish you love and joy
as you style your life






Wardrobe Recap 2021 - Accessory Love



It's that time of year.
time for me to look back at my sartorial choices 
for last year.

Recently i have spent so much time in workout clothes
I was happily surprised how many times I did 'dress'
and 
how much I still Love all of these outfits!





When I compose an outfit
I do it with either an event, location or just a feeling
I want to convey.

Sometimes I even pick a location
because of an outfit I want to. wear.



The last couple of years with so many challenge

I have fallen even more in love 
with dressing!

It's creative and controllable
when so many things are not.

A great outfit is fun to wear
adds confidence
and
makes my heart happy!





I am always  an avid fan and lover of all things

Accessories!

They give instant impact and finish 

to the most basic of pieces.



I am still a huge proponent of 

Collecting Accessories by Wardrobes


Having accessories in color wardrobes

makes it easy to pull together 

a myriad of different looks 

to fit any occasion.



This year I added in some walking 'outfits'

to my wardrobe rotations.


Jeff and I have made city and beach walks part of our 

Healthy Lifestyle

so fun outfits were a happy must.


I really do spend so much time in workout clothes

with our daily hikes and workouts

the last thing I want to do is wear them off site.


I always love a walking outfit that

functions for waling miles

while also finished and fun to stop for lunch or drinks.




My Pearl Headbands served me so well.
Always adding a strong finishing touch
to any outfit!
With the added benefit of easy pull back hairstyles!

Fabulous Accessories
make dressing so much easier!




One of my favorite wardrobe additions which will serve me for years, my


I love this wrap so much
I did an entire post all about them HERE

I consider these wraps an all purpose accessory.

Perfect for travel and warmth
with a full serving of 
Style Panache!





I enjoy trying out new silhouettes 
like this very dramatic sleeve and shoulder





 



Hats will always be one of my favorite accessories.
Not only are they big impact on 
the Style Front
they big on the skin protection front.

I literally never go out in the sun for very long
without one.
And my skin thanks me for it ... always!












Sunglasses
 are another 
Never Without accessory
for me!

Again for big style punch
but even more important
eye protection.





I had big fun with tulle skirts this year.
They just call out for a silk floral finish!




I've been adding to my collection of 
Stylish backpacks
they are the perfect hands free accessory 
for our long walks
either at home  or traveling.





For another dose of high impact style
so easily
Statement Earrings
for the win!





A perfect player with 
Statement Earrings
try a 
Headscarf!

Perfect solution for windy days
or when your hair is feeling less than.




Mine worked wonderfully with my graphic 

Statement Coat

from






Here I just paired a dress over my base of workout clothes.
Walked males and miles
and 
felt put together for a casual lunch out.




One of my favorite vintage finds
this dress
made for
 a perfect
Marfa Texas moment.





I think 
Floral Headbands
just make my heart happy!





The perfect hair finish for the floral crown
a coordinating barrette.

Talk about an easy beach look!







And how about 
A Turban

A perfect Palm Springs solve
for an evening out
after a day in the pool!

See what I mean about 

Fabulous Accessories
making 

A Stylish Life
so much easier!!





And Sunglasses!!





My broache 
Statement necklace
another perfect finish
especially with my wonderful vintage
Frank Olive straw hat!




I'm sure by now
you can realize my 
Big Accessory Love
and how 
Fabulous Accessories
make
Stylish Dressing 
so much easier!

So I will leave you here with
some of my other favorites from 2021


































































As always my friends

I wish you love and joy
as you style your life