Change Your Space ... Change Your Life



Change Your Space ... Change Your Life
is a bold statement.


But I believe it.


It doesn't have to be as big as a house move 
or 
a room remodel.


It can be as small as 

~ organizing a drawer

~ culling a closet

~ adding plants or flowers


It's about 
making steps to 
organize 
and 
beautify
your space 
to 
meet your  life needs.



Every step in that direction
is a statement in

~ Self Respect
~ Self Investment
~ Self Love and Care.



For me

organized beautiful closets

 make my heart happy.


I love seeing my pretty friends all in order

ready to be part of a 

Curated Outfit.




When each of my children moved out I grieved.


I had turned their past rooms into guest rooms
and 
filled the empty closets with my 
ever expanding wardrobe.


But the rooms still made me sad
even 5 years after my youngest left.


After a very painful
for so many reasons
Christmas
I realized 
I needed to
Change My Life


The old ways definitely were not working for me.
I talked more about my need to change
in my last post here.


Standing in this dark grey room
the day after Christmas
I had a flash.


Why not take this unused room
and 
turn it into a 
dream closet room.


How could I have not seen 
this idea before!


It was because I had been waiting years
to realize
nobody was coming back.


Cognitively 
I couldn't be happier about that fact.

I am so very proud of 
my children
and 
their individual accomplishments.


My three kids are definitely
Grown and Flown
with families of their own
and 
flourishing and thriving.  


I was the only one
still a bit caught in the past
with a big heart snag
when it came to the
kid rooms.




We had built out the kid rooms custom
with built in beds, bookcases and desks.

Some how 
I got visually stuck thinking that we needed 
to continually work around what was there.
Just adapting here and there to 
'make it work'
for at least a little use
ie. hanging 
my black and white wardrobe.


I was locked in the past
until
I wasn't.


I decided 
I
was going to take back the space!


It felt like a visual metaphor

I was going to 
Change My Space
in one of many steps to
Change My Life.





Once I made the decision
the demolition felt 
 exciting and empowering
all at the same time.


How could I have not seen this before?


Well
because it 
felt like a drastic step
to literally tear down what was
to build the new.


I also wondered if I 
deserved so much space.

Which is also silly
and 
a bit sad and telling.


The room literally sat 
empty and abandoned
except clothes storage
for 5 years!!


It had been waiting for me
 to realize
I deserved
to use it.


I deserved to have 
the space
serve my needs
of 
Organization and Beauty.


I used to feel a bit odd
because I have so many clothes.

But dressing is a 
Creative Art Form
for me.
It is 
part of 
Who I AM


I need
Beautiful Spaces
to 
organize
my clothes and accessories
that are my 
Creative Palette


I deserved to take an unused space
and 
turn it into 
a space that serve my life
my passions
and 
is a sanctuary to be in.


I just needed to be able to 
see it and feel it.
To realize 
I deserved theSpace.




Jeff and I have worked together
here at the house
bringing our visions to fruition
for decades.
Believing
homes need to change
as 
lives change.


I am forever 
Grateful
I married a man
who is able and willing
to help make my visions 
a reality.


After the room was gutted 
of all of the builtins

there were years of use and reuse
to be patched on the walls.

Which isn't that different
of how we continually 
need to patch our heart at times
as we move into new
 Life Transitions
getting ready for new 
Life Chapters.




And oh how cathartic
is a new coat of paint!

All the promise of the new to come!

Jeff and I both marveled at how much
The room  was ready for a whole new lease on life!
as am I!




Jeff refinished the wood floors
(that he had installed decades ago)

We hung double hanging rods
on both sides of the main wall
leaving the center
just single hung
for my long wardrobe pieces.

A thin shelf was made for my shoe collections
along with an elevated shelf.




Oh how I love seeing all of my pieces
in eye view and tidy!
Makes my heart happy.




I started to walk through 
my new space every day
with my morning coffee.

I loved the open spaciousness 
of the room.
But it didn't feel quite done.

It had always been a dream of mine 
to have a large closet with 
a chaise.

Some people dream of huge homes
my dreams have been of
wonderful closet spaces
where I can see everything!




So I found 
the sweetest little love seat
in pink
because
pink made my heart happy
and 
felt like
 a wonderful  frivolous luxury.


I found a dusty pink
that plays perfectly in the space.

I added two marble tables
and 
brought my in my vintage footstool.




Sitting in my new closet room
feels like 
a wonderful exhale
of calm.





I decided to warm up the space with 
tonal rug.

I started doing my morning work in my
new closet room
in the mornings
only to realize
I didn't have a big enough space
to set my computer and clip boards.




So I ordered a complementary 
coffee table
to do just that!

I got one with two shelves
so that I could keep my 
newest fashion magazines
calendar
and 
planner in place.




I found the most wonderful calendar
complete with inspiring 
monthly messages.




I am using my beautiful planner 
this year.

I write out
My Gratitudes
for the day
even before my 
daily 
to do list.

And boy
has that really 
helped me refocus on 
the 
Good in My Life.




Fresh flowers make me 
remember to be present
and 
make me so happy.



 
I use my 
essential oil diffuser
every single day.
It has a 
transporting and calminng 
effect for me.




All of my black pieces can now
stretch out into the entire closet.
No more having clothes jammed together.
A heavy clothes edit helped 
that situation as well.


It feels so luxurious 
to have space 
for everything in my 
black , white, navy and grey closet.


Although you can't see them
I also installed protective curtains over
my blacks
because the room has sunlight.


We also installed a blackout shade
and 
drapes
so in the summer 
the entire closet can be protected 
form sun damage.





I love keeping my closets by color
so I can 
keep my shoes and accessories
within neighboring color view.


It makes styling outfits 
so much more fun!


It's literally 
shopping my closet
in the very best way!





Creating accessory vignettes 
is a favorite of mine!




When I began to this 
room remodel
I really didn't realize
just how much

Changing My Space
would feel like another great
Life Change.


But it really does.


I was able to fully 
move out from 
visual odes 
to the past.


I was able to 
Self Validate
that I 
Deserved to use the Space





I was able to realize 
and 
be really good with
my space needs
and 
claim them.


We all have different passions.


Some of Mine are
Clothes and Accessories.


I am ever so 
Grateful
for my husband
and
to be at a time in my life
where I have the opportunity to 

Change My Space 
and 
Change My Life
one step at a time
and 
with a 
sunset closet view.



As always my friends

I wish you love and joy
as you style your life



















30 Days Alcohol free

 


Yesterday I completed my 

30 days Alcohol Free.


Which is monumental to me

because

I never thought I could

or 

even imagined I would want to try.




After Christmas Eve celebrations

I woke up in the middle of the night

feeling the whole weight of

the losses of the year.

Literally feeling lower than I ever had

and

 that's saying something with my history of depression.

I was beyond exhausted

and 

wondered if 

I could keep going

or

 really if I even wanted to.

It was a feeling so dark and bleak

that slipping away seemed like a real choice.

It was a low and a pain

that is seared into my heart.

I realized 

there wasn't enough alcohol in the world

to numb my aching heart

and boy

had I given it my best shot.

I also began to wonder if 

my best friend Chardonnay

wasn't really the friend 

I thought she was.

Was it time to break up?


Desperate times call for 

desperate measures.




I would have never come up with 

such 

for me

a drastic choice

if it hadn't been for my friend

Adrienne Shubin.

I had her seen a post of hers a few weeks before

where she had announced that she had been 

Alcohol Free for almost a year

and 

had lost over 70 pounds.

When  I first read about her choice to be

Alcohol Free

it sounded way to hard for me.

Now the weight loss I was all up for.


I have always had a predisposition

to drinking wine

many times in excess.

But I realize the last 3 years

with every hard thing that happened

(and there were So many)

I gave myself permission to drink

a lot.

Every night.

Just to check out

and 

numb the pain.

The losses seem to just keep coming

and 

I just kept drinking

a lot.


Until that Friday Christmas Eve

when I woke up

so low

realizing 

there just wasn't enough 

alcohol in the world

 to numb my pain.



It took me until 

Monday December 28th

to have a plan of action in place.

Adrienne Shubin

who has been exceeding generous and encouraging

(when the student is ready, the teacher will appear)

 had recommended two books to me

that I had bought some weeks before.

This  Naked Mind

and

The Alcohol Experiment 30 Day Challenge

both by Anne Grace.

I would highly recommend both 

if your'e interested.


30 days sounded like a lifetime to me.

What was I even thinking

setting myself up for 

what felt like 

would most like be another thing 

I didn't accomplish.


It I didn't have wine

who was I even?

My self identity seemed intertwined 

with 

'having wine'

It was my reward system.

It was my pleasure center.

It was my social life.

It was my bliss.

It was one of the few joys I could count on

in such a dark year.

It was the only way I knew how

to have fun.

~ I even appreciated the dullness the next day

it felt like a protective blanket 

from the realities that had become my life.


It was also what had me

~ waking up at 3 am every morning

in a complete panic.

~ It was how I began every morning

trying to count how many glasses 

I had the night before

and 

judging myself accordingly.

~ It filled me with daily self loathing

and 

slowed my hikes and workouts.

~ It made me feel like a prisoner in my own life.

I didn't even dare to want to break out.

It felt impossible.



But I have.

For 30 whole days.

I don't know my future relationship with alcohol

to be completely transparent.

but I do know 

I don't want to return to 

what I had.


The biggest gift has been

being able to sleep blissfully

through the night.

Even without any over the counter sleep aid

that I have been using for a least a decade.

I have been chasing solid sleep for decades.


I have also lost weight

by not drinking and making several other changes.




But I still miss drinking wine

to be perfectly honest.


I know I need to find new ways to

have fun.

To be able access joy.



So the journey will continue.


But today

I wanted to take the time

to say 

I did it.


I set what to me felt like 

an impossible goal

and 

I actually accomplished it.


I think I will definitely

Crown Myself

 today.




As always my friends

I wish you love and joy
as you style your life









2020 Wardrobe Recap ... and Reflection



It's that time of year again
when I look back at what I've worn 
over the year.

I have to say
I have been back and forth 
as to if I even wanted to do it this year.

For me it was a year
filled with personal loss
on different levels
but
none more than losing my dad.

But I don't think ignoring the year
will help heal my heart
and 
after all
I am still standing.

Ready to take on the 
New Year
with optimism
and 
Gratitude.

But I also think there is personal power
in
acknowledging 
life's storms.




Loosing my Dad in September
was so hard.

Because of Covid
I was only able to see him
one time during his two months in ICU.

He had gone into the hospital
for what was supposed to be a simple surgery
in July.
Complications arose
 he ended up in ICU a few days later.
From there it was weeks and weeks
of a roller coaster of expectations
of him surviving.
It got to a point he wanted to be able to die
knowing he would never recover 
to any quality of life.
he got to a point he was more gone 
than here.
Not even able to breathe on his own.

On September 3rd
my brother, Jeff and I 
were allowed to be at his bedside
as they took him off the ventilator
and
he was allowed to die a peaceful death
with dignity.




2020 has been a year of hardship and loss for so many.
and 
we must all find ways 
to go on.

Learning how to balance our grief
with the intentions of 
doing good where we can.


Finding and acknowledging 
all the beauty and goodness
that there is in life.


For me 
I find solace and calm
in pulling together outfits
that I am happy to wear.

I love the creative process
I love having something 
that I can control.

Dressing in an 'outfit'
reminds me of my mother
who ingrained  the concept of 
'an outfit' into me.

Wearing an outfit I love 
makes my heart happy.

And that makes me more able 
to give to others.

For me
Creative Personal Style
Confirms My Soul

My love of 
accessories and clothes
is part of who I am.
I can still remember what I wore in kindergarten.


I share that love here
in the hopes 
that if you share the same love
maybe 
I can inspire your own creativity
and 
passion.


Whether it's clothes or cooking
or a myriad of other creative outlets
creativity
is so important to
living a joyous life!


From here I offer some of my favorite outfits
form 2020.
Reminding myself
there were good moments
in the midst of the heartbreaking ones.




I always love elevating 
basic pieces
by combining them
and 
finishing with a wonderful dose of 
Coordinating Accessories.

Here it's an interplay with
straws and shells.




A happy happy day at Disneyland
last February!

Jeff and I have 
thrived as a couple 
through so many trying times this past year.

I am so thankful we worked so hard
the last few years
rebuilding such 
a strong marriage.

Our marriage continues to 
Thrive
as a true partnership.
Jeff is one of the very best parts 
of my life.




One of my very favorite outfits 
of 2020.
We took it out to the beach for pictures
the whole walk
felt like magic!




My favorite bag of 2020
brought 
my big loves of
Pearls and Basketry
together!




 I decided to make myself get dressed
for cocktails outside!

I did this outfit around my 
personally designed
shell and pearl earrings!

They are part of my newest Collection
that I am in the works of launching soon!




The month of May
 still dressing for home.

'Glamming Up'
sweats with 
two more of my designs
 Turban and Statement Earrings!

2020 sure had me refining
Cozy Comfortable
with a big dose of
Statement Accessories
for 
Instant At Home Glam!




June had  me pulling out my caftan and turban
for an easy at home
Glam Look
with once again the instant infusion of
Statement Accessories!




Jeff and I were so happy
about the new terrace 
we put in 2019.
Never even knowing how much
 we would use it in 2020.




Plenty of neighborhood sunset walks.




Paired this off the shoulder denim dress from
with some of my favorite 
Western Accessories!
I definitely enjoyed getting dressed for even
takeout!




Walks on the beach
are always 
a balm to my soul.




Yep.
More dressing for home.
Upgrading two basic pieces
to 
'an outfit'
with plenty of 
Statement Accessories!



Our accessory du Jour 
for 2020.

I have quite the collection
but this is my favorite
go with everything
well fitting
and 
most importantly
easy to breathe
from the lovely
from the UK




Saturday summer nights 
at home.

I have to say 
our gardens have never looked better!
Certainly one of the many
Silver Linings of 2020.




Definitely enjoyed  dressing up for 
Take Out
and a
Photo Shoot







Summer Sunset Strolls 
on the beach

Never again  will I take the beach for granted
after the closings  for months here in California.




Still got out for 
photoshoots!
This fabulous dress is another from




Wearing an outfit I love
to cheer myself.

It works.
I highly recommend!




Beach rides with my love.




We even got a weekend away at the 
brand new and fabulous
located in Temecula!
I shared all about it HERE
With only five cottages
it felt entirely safe
during this Covid times.




We were lucky enough to catch lots of 
spectacular sunsets.

One thing about difficult times
they always have me searching hard for
 all the beauty
and 
silver linings I can find.




There were also times
hiding under a big hat felt ideal.




But each time I got up again.






And outfits that I loved
Helped 
Every Single Time







That concludes my 
2020 Recap.

As hard of a year as it was
I still have ever so much to be 
Grateful 
for.

Here's to 
greeting the 
New Year
with 
strength, courage 
and 
Gratitude
for every 
Silver Lining 
we can find!

Wishing each and everyone of you
New Year 
full of blessings!




As always my friends

I wish you Love and Joy
as you 
Style Your Life