How I Lost Over 40 Pounds

Recently I have had many people

ask me to share

how I lost over 40 pounds

and

just as importantly

kept it off.

There was no easy fix.

But I did figure out how to 

make sustainable

life changes

that added up to the successful

weight loss I was after.

I think of them as my

building blocks .

The changes I made 

 came out of one of the lowest points

of my life.

Sometimes if we are able to harness our pain

it can become the impetus for the change we seek.

I only share that

because if I wasn't in a deep dark pain

I probably wouldn't have put 

in the tremendous effort I needed to really change.

I remember wondering at the end of 2020

when I started

if there would come a time

I would be 

grateful for the pain

as an impetus for change.

I am.

But it was a long and uncomfortable road.

As true life changes 

usually are.

There had been so much loss and sadness since November 7th, 2017

weight gan over the three following years 

was literally the least of my problems.

Even coming across this shocking to me picture

from May of 2020

didn't kick in any change.

I was in a continual state of what felt to me

 of surviving and coping.

And I thought chardonnay was my best friend.

I drank to forget I was more overweight than I felt acceptable.

I drank hard a couple  of those years to drown out a broken heart form a marital infidelity.

During that time my mother's health was failing.

During an eight month span 

she had a broken back,  broken hip, pneumonia, another broken hip

and 

more respiratory problems

until her little body just gave out.

I drank because of my Mom dying.

I drank because of my oldest son 

 once more decided to  estrange from the family.

I drank because on January 22 of 2020

 my husband was let go from his executive job 

of 25 years

out of the blue.

I drank because I was so scared

while my dad was in the ICU for months during  COVID

after complications from what was supposed to be a simple surgery.

I drank more when he died.

I drank because my youngest moved with his family to Texas.

But mainly  I drank 

because I felt like a life failure.

I continued to drink (a lot) until

Christmas Eve 2020

I woke up in the middle of the night

literally realizing 

there wasn't enough alcohol in the world 

to ease my pain.

I remember feeling if I didn't wake up in the morning

I would be OK with that.

Everything

just felt like too much.

And 

if I did wake up

I would have to make  some drastic changes

in my life.

This way was way too painful.

It took me a couple of days to come up with a plan.

First off was to do a painful breakup

with 

Chardonnay

Maybe it wouldn't be forever

(it wasn't0

but I knew it would have to be at least 

30 Days Alcohol Free

I wrote about my story HERE

My  friend Adrienne Shubin

had shared her no Alcohol story

and

 had mentioned the book 

'The Alcohol Experiment 

I bought all the Quit Lit she recommended.

HERE 

is Adrienne's blog link

The next 30 days

were awful

and 

I hard 

 so many pity parties 

feeling like I was giving up the only source of joy

I allowed myself.

I never really thought I would be successful with

 changing my relationship with wine.

But I did.

And that  was 

life changing.

I realized what a daily habit 

having wine had become.

I drank as a reward for accomplishment

at the end of the day.

I drank if I was sad.

I drank if I was happy.

I realized how stunted my

 coping strategies 

had become.

And just how habitual.

I realized how

 limiting my own 

Self Belief 

had become.

Slowly I began to make other changes

as I could step back 

and

observe bad habits

and 

self defeating coping strategies.

2020 vs 2021

Again I followed Adrienne's advice.

She had shared how 

Intermittent Fasting 

had also helped her in losing 90 pounds.

I was in.

But carefully.

Because I had suffered from an eating disorder

for too many years to count.

Bulimia had been a part of my life

a big, big part 

at one point

before I had children.

Intermittentant Fasting

works for me, surprisingly.

It lets me feel more in control of what I eat

and

 when.

The added benefit being that I sleep so much better too!

I started out slowly

and

 then began getting down to 

a six to eight hour window of eating.

I'm not recommending this to everyone

but with my past and history

it works for me.

The other part of  my success with

Intermittent Fasting

is being

Calorie Deficit

which is simply eating less calories

thank my body needs 

in order to loose weight.

That really is the bottom line of the weight loss

There are just a lot of 

supportive components 

to make this doable 

and 

more importantly

consistent.

The next building block was to up my physical activity.

I have always worked out.

Just as much for mental health

as 

physical health.

I increased my hike from 2-3 miles a day

to 5-6 miles last summer.

I average about 3 miles a day

5 days a week now.

We are very fortunate to live in an area

with spectacular hiking opportunities. 

Jeff and I have made them part of our 

healthy lifestyle.

They are a gift I am always 

Grateful 

for.

Hiking in Nature

is what I do for my

Mind, Body and Soul.

I also weight train 3 days a week

with yoga and Pilates rounding out my work outs.

I think there are so many different ways to lose weight.

But I think

 one of the most important building blocks

is replacing

self sabotaging habits 

with 

healthier, successful habits.

Simply said

 new ways 

to find joy!

One thing that has really helped me

My Gratitude List.

I write it down 

every morning

right next to my to Do List.

It really helps me focus on all of the good

in my life.

It also helps me stay positive

with my progress

which sometimes felt incredibly slow.

But trust me

a lot of little changes

carried out consistently

really do make a difference.

I believe I was able to make changes

because I was at a point

not to change 

was just too painful.

And now I know

it really isn't about 

the weight

or 

drinking or not drinking.

It's about developing

a good relationship

with my self.

It is really about learning to trust myself.

To have compassion for myself.

To realize

I might not have always gotten it right

but I know I was always

trying my best.

I just needed learn more successful 

coping strategies

when it got down to it.

i needed to get to a place

where I allowed myself to succeed.

To find new ways of coping 

that don't 

Self Sabotage

the things I am working on

and 

hold important.

Better 

healthier 

ways for me

to find joy.

And little by little

learn to see myself

more lovingly.

One thing the last four years 

have taught me is

 life is hard enough

without being at 

war with myself.

 

And when we know better

we do better.

True personal change

is a process.

And it can come out of pain.

There really is no perfect time

to decide to change your life for the better.

I started my process with one step

and 

continued to add the others

as I got solid with each building block.

~ Changing my relationship to Alcohol

~ Intermittent Fasting

~ Consistent Calorie Deficient

~ Consistent and Sustainable Work Outs

and 

most importantly to me

I added

 new to me

~ Successful Coping Strategies

to my self discipling

so that I could sustain

the process of change!

A process that needs

all the 

Self Compassion

you can find.

As always my friends

I wish you love and joy

as you style your life