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Rebalancing After A Week With The Flu

This weeks Friday date night attire
was all about being cozy.
After years of no true sick days 
I succumbed this week to an ugly flu
so Friday was my first day out in almost a week.

A week of being sick
has of course left my house in disarray,
I have quickly caught up on business right off.
But what I wasn't expecting is
how it has left me so emotionally vulnerable.

outfit details : hat-lack of color, wrap-cashmere lover, sweater-H&M, tunic-Free People, jeans-NYDJ, booties-Zara, bag-Target

Not practicing my normal self care 
in the form of
hiking in nature and working out.

Morning rituals of coffee and candlelight
pondering all I have to be grateful in my life.

Making a point  daily of making someone's day brighter
passing out love and compliments like confetti.

Time in the garden and the sun shine.

Eating nutritiously.

Living in order and beauty.

Dressing myself with care and respect.

Without my intentional focus on the good
I have been sucked back into 
feeling the loss once again of children moving on.
Feeling like I am living one long goodbye.
Waiting for the heartache of the final child moving on.

With only our youngest 18 year old at home these days
a true empty nest is on the forefront.
And as he is here less and less
the deafening silence in the house 
seems to be on the increase
in a manner so engulfing
that I feel maybe a move may be necessary
but since I love my gardens so
most likely a total house remodel after the wedding.

Afresh start in a family home.
A fresh start that looks to the future
rather than holding on to the shadows of the past.
I can't believe how many pictures on walls
I have of when they were young
like razor sharp reminders of a time that will never come again .

So as soon as I finish this post today
I will begin once again getting my house in order
returning quickly to a plan of self care that I know works.

I will remind myself
daily courage is needed
in order to celebrate the time I  do have with my son
 while he is at home.
Courage to overcome the fear of the pain involved
with his inevitable moving on.
I will remind myself I do not want to taint this time left
with my fear of the heartache to come.
But to remind myself I have survived the two before.
 I know even though I have been through this twice before
this one will still be as hard
if not more.

But I will remind myself
I am a strong women
who can love fiercely
bear the consequences of doing so.
I will put my pieces back together
so I can celebrate the here and now
 not tainting it with the fear of the pain of tomorrow.

I will take time to make a conscious effort 
to refocus my intent
on my gratitudes.

My health
Time in which I have the luxury to create.
Time once again with my husband.
Time to enjoy my adult children
marvel int the wonderful people they have become.
Time and opportunity to travel.
Time once again with friends
both old and new.

Time to design a new home in an old house.

Time to acknowledge long goodbyes ...

with beautiful new hellos.

As always my friends

I wish you love and joy 
as you style your life

linking with
Style Nudge


  1. I understand what you are going through, I felt it when my two sons left home. But life only got better as they married and have children. My family is so big now with daughter-in-laws that I love and call me mom, with an a three-year old grandson who is the image of his dad and a granddaughter arriving in August who they are naming after me. Life is even more beautiful than ever before. So as you say goodbye to the past, know with joy in your heart, the best is yet to come! Peace! Cheryl

    1. Cheryl what a gift your encouraging words truly are. Thank you my dear for taking the time … to stop by and share your beautiful view … from a little further down the path. My heart and soul thank you. xox

  2. Strength, courage... both needed to go through transitions of any kind. I take each day one day at time ...for today rejoice in the one you still have to spend time with...rejoice in the wedding plans to be finalized ...and rejoice in the hidden treasures on the horizon waiting to be unearthed. It may be a time of pruning, but those grapevines you live so near will grow fuller and more ripe after the pruning is over...and so will you. I am excited for amazing women, creative, vibrant with potential to soar.

    1. Pam thank you for your beautiful and poetic words of encouragement … they truly touch my heart. You are quite right … I intend to regain my focus … and savor the joys this season has to give … pruning and all. xox

  3. Lovely post, beautiful look. I love this so soft color scheme. The bag, scarf and sweater are some cuties. The beauty of oversize.

    1. Thank you Josep-Maria for your kind words! So lovely that you have returned to this blogging world! Welcome back!

  4. I feel your pain. Our youngest is graduating from college next month and moving out of state in September. I can hardly bear to think of it.
    But your daily self-care ritual and plans for the future sound like beautiful ways to handle this time of change. Best wishes. xo

    1. Deborah thank you for your kind words. Best of luck to you on your next transition. That is definitely a big one. Sending hugs! xox

    2. Love hearing about how you spend your day. Truly you have wonderful things to look forward to, namely grandkids.

  5. Oh Tamera.

    Mr D rarely cooked until I started reflecting empty nest syndrome.( When the kids left for college.) He would have dinner waiting for me when I returned from work. I sometimes think that the cooking was his therapy.

    Your friend Cheryl gave you wonderful advice with a view forward.

    I can visualize you making "petite couronnes" one day ( in my mind's eye ) as I write. But first the wedding of the beautiful Ellis Tracy! I love her new hair by the way . . .

    I am glad to hear that you are feeling better. I must warn you not to over do. My virus turned into a secondary infection that lasted 12 days. ( nearly three weeks! )

    Your cozy introspection is endearing inspiration!

    Have I told you my secret about saying goodbye? Before I let go of the hug I make sure I am visualizing the next hello.

    1. Dearest Lynne thank you for taking the time for leaving such sweet words here! They truly warm my heart!

      I am glad you have recovered from your virus … and I will definitely heed your advice on not overdoing!

      Thank you for sharing your secret to saying goodbye! What a beautiful way to do it! You are such a loving inspiration! xoxo

  6. It's even better when the kids start to fly by themselves.
    I thought it would be difficult too but its wonderful to see them living the life that they want.
    This last week my girl was in town and I saw a really strong young lady.I was so pleased that she is nothing like me.
    Also I have my man back all for me its a win win situation!
    So look after yourself but DO NOT think too much, get and do.After all our job is to teach them to go out into the world and hopefuly we have done a good job.

    1. Liz thank you for the reminder … of what I know to be true.My illness left me a bit weepy for the past. But I am recovering and definitely will take your advice on not thinking too much about it all … and just go do! thank you for taking the time to leave your sage reminder and wisdom. xox

  7. Enjoy the precious moments with your youngest Tamera. We took our three for one final family holiday, just before the inevitable, and then they flew off one by one, every couple of years. It is bittersweet, but one does adjust, and a new life opens up for us. Grandchildren come along eventually, and the joy they bring is beyond imagining! xx

    1. Patricia thank you for sharing your own sweet story … and your words of encouragement. They warm my heart! I definitely intend to make the most with my youngest … thank you for this reminder as well! xox

  8. Dearest Tamera, my motto always is ...yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today it is a gift. You do right, when you live in the
    present and enjoy time with your youngest but without a tear or regret when he fly away. Let him loose and he will always say hello and
    know where his nest was.

  9. Hello Tamera...such a beautiful, touching post...our 26 year old daughter hasn't lived at home for many years now and although I miss her like crazy I'm also, like you, so proud of the young, independent woman she has become. We have our wonderful memories of the young, family days and now we have many more to is a joy and I simply love your outlook on inspire, thank you xx

  10. Tamera....I hope you don't mind I popped some of these wonderful photos of you modelling my wrap on my FB page...thank you xx

  11. Lovely, lovely post. Im living the empty nest syndrome right now. My youngest (of 3) is moving overseas next month, my daughter was married last month, my middle son has moved on too, and my Dad died in February. I know the pain of loss you speak of so eloquently. Thank you always for your beautiful posts.