.... { the second one leaves the nest }....



It's official...
my second has grown and flown...

and as a mom...
there is surely a mixed bag of emotions left in the wake.

 I'm proud...
I'm sad...
I'm excited and relieved it all worked out...

I'm hoping I did a good job...
so he knows just how much I love him.
Our relationship has been complicated...
In retrospect... I think much of it by imperfect communication...

I think he grew up not knowing how much I really loved him...
I hope I sent him off to college with a better understanding 
of just how much I do love him...

 We helped him get all moved in last Friday...
into his new space that will now be his home...

I'm still coming to terms with this idea....


The room  in which he spent his  entire18 years...
is still as he left it...
still waiting for the final pack away and new purpose...

But I know it will be that way for a while...
for this mama...
it's just too soon...

Every morning his alarm clock still goes off...
and I go in to shut it off...
always knowing I can unplug it...

but some how this haunting alarm is still a connection
that I'm just not ready to break...


I love you Slater.






t

23 comments:

  1. What a handsome young man. I can tell you are a very good mother, Tamera. It must be so difficult to let your kids leave your nest.
    Hope you are doing well and will enjoy some of the aspects of this big change.
    xo, Adrienne

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    1. Adrienne, thank you so very much for your kind words. I am doing my best to focus on new roads ahead!

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  2. Oh, I teared up reading this. My son's alarm goes off every morning too and I wonder if I will do the same thing. Did he go far? Even if he didn't, it is still a big adjustment. M. heads back to college tomorrow. She is a wiser and more introspective young lady for sure. She's full of self doubts and confusion about her future. So hard for us mamas to see. The name Slater is terrific. I wish for the best for him and for you as you all go through this transition! We both have one guy left home!

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    1. Sarah he actually didn't go far ..... which worked out great .... luckily I 'needed' to drive something up for him on Saturday. I felt much better knowing he was settling in quite nicely. Savor and enjoy your time with your guy!!

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  3. What a heartfelt post! I am sure your son knows he is completely loved. He's one handsome young man, love that photo of the two of you, and his awesome fire-leaping skills! As with all of life's changes, it takes time to adjust, and you are allowed to feel sad. But he is on to the next exciting stage of his life - what's the next exciting thing for you?! xxxxx

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    1. I so enjoy your visits all the way from the UK my dear! Thanks so for the kind words! It does take time to adjust.. My next exciting thing has been in the works for some time now... I am hoping to return successfully to designing fashion accessories. I remind myself... tiny steps each day will equal success!

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  4. Oh boy. I read this and I think of sending off my son, my first child, only boy. It's four years away. Not all that far off. Sometimes, I too, wonder if I've done enough. If when they leave they will be okay. God loves them more than we do. That's hard to imagine, but so true. The mistakes we make/made are some of the ways that God can use to help them learn more about Him. I love the photo of you two. Such nice smiles. (And teeth!) Such love. // xo, ab

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    1. Hi Anne, I waas just thinking of you today. Thank you for your words of comfort... they mean much to my heart!

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  5. Oh man, this got me. Reduced me to a puddle. I watched from the window today as my sweet baby played. I thought to myself, that I really don't believe someday he won't be there...

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    1. I remember many times doing the same Danielle... I thought I was prepared for it... but I don't know if you early can....

      So very happy to see you are back in your space... I have missed you so!!!

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  6. It has been eleven years this past August that we drove our son to a different state, unloaded the car, and planted him in his new world. We did so with the hopes he had strong roots that could withstand the dry days, the windy days and they hail storms life could send his way. It was one of the most difficult days a loving Momma can have. Here is the good news. Life has sent that teenage boy some hail,wind and arid conditions. However, the roots he had helped him blossom into the man he is today.And he is a good man.
    Tamera, I just know your Slater has strong roots that will support him, continue to grow him and nourish him. You are a wonderful Mom. And I bet my bottom dollar he know how much you love him. Keep that alarm ringing! Every time it rings, think of those beautiful roots you have given him and the joy he has and will continue giving you! Blessings, sweet Tamera!

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    1. My dear your comment brought tears ... really good tears.... and comfort. Today when his alarm went off ... it sounded different. Thank you dear Barb.

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  7. What a great name...Slater...and I am certain he know you love him now! I married off my second one over Christmas and moved the two married couples into new homes. I still have a 21 year old at home and he just needs to finish college and get a vision for his future. Seasons changing...learning new roles...but it is still fun!

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    1. My dear much congratulations to you and yours .... what accomplishments all around! I didn't know you still had a son at home ...I am in awe of all you so! Thank you so much for the kind words and inspiration!

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  8. Oh, Tamera, lovely post. All best to your dear young man in his new life's venture, and to you in yours, xoxo

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  9. A heart felt post....
    Here's my favorite quote on how I feel about being a mother....
    "Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had, and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed." ~ Linda Wooten

    God bless!

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    1. Great quote my dear... thank you so much for sharing the wisdom!

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  10. i LOVE that last photo, WOW!

    thanks for writing this, it's so helpful and i'll have to read and re-read in about 7 months.

    xo

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    1. So good to hear from you my dear! Wow, only 7 months now ... how are you doing ?

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  11. It must be so hard for mums, I'm used to an empty house but the silence must deafen you at times.

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    1. On some days it is hard .... and others not so bad :) As always dear Tabitha thanks for visiting .... your visits always remind me how much I love and miss Scotland!

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  12. So sweet Tamera. I found this when I signed up for your Bloglovin. Awesome, now you will always be in my inbox. xoxoxoxox

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